Dog Feeding And Hard Breathing

The Saddest Experience In All My Life Was Having My Dog Dying On My Hands

I was feeding the dog and my breathing was heavy because I catch the flu. That feeding wasn’t successful, she also caught the flu. Dog feeding and hard breathing were demanding mission for bought of us.

Last few days weather has gone crazy. So we are too. My family is divided into active and proactive weather members.

Instead of enjoying nice summer on the island, we experience a bad change in temperature and weather. That reflected on us mentally and physically.

Weather Change

We live in tropical climate and this period of the year is the best time of the year. Not this year, obviously.

Rain was smoothing us slowly more than a few days. After all, there is not supposed to be rain at all at this time of the year, not now.

Now is the dry season (should be!) with a lot of sun and windy days. We use to call it kite season. Two kite festivals are this month. Beautiful, gigantic kings of the sky are up over our heads non stop.

We all get sick. My kid, hubby, dog and me. All got flu. Heavy sneezing, running nose and coughing.

While my dog suffer the most we were handling it very well this time. I don’t want to think what flu is this. Five days she has problem to eat, having running snout full of mucus.

She is a big dog, a big mama bear with the greatest smile dog can have. She does not want to eat. How could she eat? No smell, no taste, not even enough saliva in her mouth.

Flu Season

This cold is not a common cold, how usually it is. No, no mere, simple one. I prepared some blended food for her like she is a puppy to try to feed her even a little. She didn’t have the mood to eat but I insist. To eat or to die.

While I was preparing her blended chicken I was thinking. How long already she has been like this, how my kid is getting better and where am I with all of this?

One week I am not turning my computer, not reading my mails, not moving forward. Not moving anywhere.

I need to get my breath back to full capacity, which is not so easy. Need to spit this hell out of my chest, get the lungs full of air. Time is my ally and my enemy.

Endless Moments

How long we will be like this? All of us. My kid is much better, I am a little bit better and my husband is at the beginning of the “common cold”.

Now it cracking him down. My dog is not eating yet. She is on Nutri-gel, which is not food but keeps her alive. She is drinking dogs’ flu drops, they work. The next big step will be when she starts to eat.

My blog is stagnating, I didn’t write or explore new topics and trends long (btw one week is a lifetime when you are in hurry). I didn’t even sleep well for the past few days.

My brain was blank. Sometimes that is good when is like that.

People who practice yoga, do meditation daily to reach that state of mind. To clear the thoughts, body and mind with very effective technic.

I Must Let Go

Nothing good happened in the last few days. While I am writing this she is not with us anymore. My smiley girl passed away from the “common cold”. I must let her go.

It was the saddest experience I had in the last decade of my life. My dog was dying on my hands and I cannot do anything to help her. The saddest undergo ever.

She was asking us to go out to the garden, under the open sky and we bring her out. She couldn’t stand up on her legs, but clearly asking to go out.

When the dogs are dying, they want to be alone not to make us people feel heavy. Not to make us sad. That makes me feel more desperate, she didn’t eat and I need to let her go.

I had offer her all her favourite food and nothing works. She was suffering greatly and she was fighting the same way. Incredible, amazing dog! We don’t deserve them, their souls and their pureness. 

Upcoming days are days of fog in my brain, full of massive sadness and tears. I am searching for her around the house, filling her pot for water and realising she is not here.

Conclusion

Days are passing but the pain remains. I try to focus on good things, my kid and daily tasks. I have one beautiful male dog who feels that void in our house the same way I do, he tries to find her like she is hidden in some corner waiting just for him.

They use to play until they are totally exhausted, running in circles with wonderful smiles on their faces. I will keep her smiley snout looong in my memory.

Love them if you have one, two or three as I had, love them unconditionally as they love us and make their life as beautiful as possible. My biggest regret is that my girl left hungry 🙁